Finally. A self help blog that gives you permission to be YOU.

by Connie Henriquez on October 13, 2011

Disclaimer: Connie’s blogs are not edited.  Although she is fully aware of grammatical usage she tends to make up her own (come on…the girl created her own philosophy for pete’s sakes…).  If you are new to Connie’s blog, you will see she loves the use of commas, run on sentences, continued periods……..and makes no apologies for it.  At times Connie may use words that some may find offensive.  Therefore if you are easily offended OR not wanting to live a FREAKIN AMAZING life, please refrain from reading her blogs.  Instead, please google “life coaches who conform and pretend to like it”. 

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My Chihuahua, Piper and Cancer…wahhhhhhh!!!

by Connie Henriquez on April 2, 2012

In October 2011, a vet diagnosed my Chihuahua Piper with lymphoma.  He gave her 4-6 weeks to live “at best”.  I was devastated but also very hopeful, as I never rely on someone else’s opinion if it doesn’t feel 100% right to me.

After much research online (due to my refusal to accept the Dr.’s grim prognosis), I found the most amazing holistic remedies that were either known to cure or prolong the lives of animals with cancer.   As a result, Pipes lived a happy vibrant life for 6 full months after her diagnoses, and passed in her sleep 5:05am this morning while lying in my arms.

I write this article today, not to bring knowledge of Pipes passing but INSTEAD to encourage others to

1) NEVER accept when someone (even a trained professional) tells you nothing can be done.

2) NEVER lose faith because someone (even a trained professional) tells you it’s not possible.

3) AND NEVER allow facts to dictate what your options are.  

There are many unexplained cures and remedies to help assist the process of many ailments, and or diseases.  I am not saying that these processes will result in a cure, but I am saying that if you BELIEVE, you have NOTHING to lose.

Each visit to the vet thereafter, my vet, after seeing my hopefulness, would always attempt to discourage me by saying, how it would only be a matter of time, and for everything I said I was doing to help her, he said I was “wasting my time”.  (What an a…)

Needless to say, I stopped going to that vet, but I often wondered how many other people would have left, losing hope and waiting for their animal to die.

So as I write this article, I am very sad to see my little pipes leave my side so soon, but I am SOOOOO THANKFUL FOR HER, and the amazing lesson which is…NEVER GIVE UP HOPE, REGARDLESS OF WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS…(even if it’s a trained professional).

 

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Stop crying about your age.

No one cares about your age, UNLESS YOU DO.  I see it all the time.  Girls commenting on how old they are, how they aren’t married, haven’t met Mr. Right yet and question whether they will still be able to have children.

Every time I hear a comment referencing above I cringe.  Not because their feelings aren’t valid, but because they are going about it all the wrong way.  The only reason your age matters, is because YOU make it matter.  That’s right.  IT begins with YOU.

How YOU FEEL about yourself is ALWAYS how the WORLD (other people) view you.  It’s your attitude.  It doesn’t matter the words you choose, but it’s about the vibe you project.  For example, how many times have you met someone (I get this a lot for being a life coach) and before they tell you a story, which usually involves a complaint of some sorts, they begin with, “I’m a very positive, person, BUT…”.  In one breathe their saying they’re a positive person, and in the next breath all I can hear is their complaining. (BTW…if you truly are a positive person…which I am not a fan of that label anyway… you don’t have to say it…and by saying it….it usually means you’re not…but anyway…)

Your vibe, your energy, your attitude is what sets the importance around your age.  If YOU FEEL old, people will treat you as if you’re old.  If YOU FEEL BAD that you’re single, not married, and have no kids, people will feel bad for you, and or make comments that will make you feel bad.

BUT, if you come from a place of…

  • “I look great” (which at any age…you should look the best you can…hence…makeup, hair…blah…blah)

 

  •  “I am single and ready to mingle.”  That means you are open to ways of meeting guys.  Hence going out, online dating etc.  Don’t complain you are single, if all you do is work.

 

  • Appreciate EVERY guy you meet.  For every guy you meet, it helps clarify the qualities you want in a guy.  Don’t complain about what he does wrong (goodness you don’t have to marry him) but acknowledge the things he does right, for example, maybe you have no common interests, but perhaps he does open the door for you.  Appreciate all the little tid bits he does offer and the more you do, the closer you will get to finding Mr. Right.

 

  • Also, YOU NEED to be hopeful.  If you doubt any of this, it will not work, because again it’s your attitude, not the words you speak that will get you the guy, the marriage and the family.   How do you know if you’re hopeful? You will know because as you read this, you will feeeeeeeeel good thinking about all the possibilities. And if you feel DOUBTFUL, you will know, because you will feeeeeeel bad thinking this will never work.

And lastly…HAVE FUN with all of this.  GEEZ!  Stop looking at your age and SO WILL EVERYONE ELSE.  Goodness…I still have to think about how old I am, when someone asks me.  Why?  Because I don’t care! The only thing I care about is doing my best to look good, AND feel good.  And guess what…most people assume I’m in my twenties!  And what do I say to that.  NOTHING.  I just smile.  Why?  Because I don’t care, and no one else does either.

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Your Child is Gay. Now What…?

by Connie Henriquez on February 16, 2012

Yeah…I can imagine.  You’re thinking of all the ways your child’s life will be different.  Or worse yet…how will they manage in a world that at times can be so cruel…

OR…you can be one of those parents who secretly question what YOU did wrong as a parent…

WELL…

guess what… [click to continue…]

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Why your life sucks and what YOU CAN DO about it RIGHT NOW.

by Connie Henriquez on December 5, 2011

Stop freakin complaining.  Yup!  Stop complaining about where you are, what you are doing, or who is doing what to you.  Just knock it off. 

The more you complain, the more you perpetuate things in your life to complain about.  Besides…hearing someone complain is suchhhhh a turn off.

However, if you complain to a complainer…you will become the best of friends…yup…good luck with that one.

INSTEAD…next time…zip it.  Next time you open your mouth, make a CHOICE to speak of something good…refreshing…something WORTH talking about.  TRY IT…you will see in time…you really will…have nothing to complain about.

The lesson of this blog is…

1) The reason why your life sucks is BECAUSE you keep complaining…on WHY YOUR life sucks…

2) People do not want to hear WHY YOUR life sucks (AND if they do…THEIR life probably sucks as well).

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How to overcome your SUCKY childhood…

by Connie Henriquez on December 1, 2011

Let your parent’s off the hook.  They gave you life so YOU can create YOUR own.  That’s it. Don’t hold them responsible for your hang ups.  They did the best they could at the time (yeah…their human too…).  Think of all the times you screwed up when you were younger.  Now add a couple of kids to the mix. 

Besides you have two choices…blame away for where you are now.  OR OWN UP to the most amazing opportunity your parents did give you…and that’s called a chance at a very amazing LIFE (however…the “amazing” part is YOUR choice).

The lesson of this blog is…

The reason you feel stuck is because YOU ARE ALLOWING your past to KEEP YOU from your AMAZING future… (and this my friend is a plain ole waste of your time…)

 

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How to handle someone who is rude to you…

by Connie Henriquez on November 28, 2011

Don’t be offended.  People that are rude to you…do not like themselves.  Period.  Their rudeness has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.  Many times, we take it personal as if we did something wrong or we deserved their reaction.  The truth is…YOU didn’t.

So chalk it up…to them not being happy with themselves…and move on gleefully—> appreciating that it is NOT you in their shoes…!  The lesson of this blog is…

NEVER let an anyone make YOU feel less than the AMAZING, SUPER AWESOME PERSON YOU ARE…

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When to break up?

by Connie Henriquez on October 17, 2011

When to break up…?  I know.  When you are apart you miss them.  Then when you’re together, you are reminded of all the reasons you are secretly devising an exit strategy.

Don’t fret.  I know- you know the relationship is not great, and you beat yourself up for even staying in it.  But listen, somehow, someway the relationship has served you.  Whether it was the companionship when you needed it, or whether being with them allowed you to become really clear about the ideal qualities you want for your next partner.  Either way, lighten up.

Life is about exploring and learning about yourself.  Some times (even though we know better) it takes us a little longer to find the courage to make that change.  And guess what. That’s okay.  Don’t feel bad and stop feeling guilty.

You know you deserve better but this relationship has provided you with the  perfect foundation to prepare you for your future much improved, new relationship. Remember, it is easier to identify what qualities are important to you once you experience a relationship where those qualities are not present.

Then when you finally realize that you are done putting up with the stuff that does not serve you.  And you become sooooo clear about what you NOW want.  You will be ready.  Now, of course it doesn’t have to get to that point, but if it does for you…that’s okay too ;-)

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How to get over ex

by Connie Henriquez on October 13, 2011

How to get over ex (insert your ex’s name here…)!  Sometimes we fall in love with the IDEA of someone.

Then when we realize they do not live up to our idea…we then blame them for not being who we expect them to be.  But in essence…(and in fairness to them) they never were.

Don’t waste your time waiting around trying to make them into someone they’re not.

Instead…

Thank them for being (and sticking to) who they really are, by not being who you wanted them to be.  Then…get the f*ck out of there…and go after what you really want.

Cuz life…is never about settling…for less then you deserve.

 

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